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Hello wonderful people. I’ve been holding on to this one for a while and I think it’s high time I post it. Where do I begin when I feel like there is an ocean of emotion behind this short photo essay. To be honest, I’ll probably leave out some of my truth because it’s too hard to share but here it goes.
For the last couple of years I’ve been on a journey to try to understand the worth of wedding photography. I’ve always known it to be beautiful and interesting but have wondered if it was worth a life’s pursuit. I’ve made plenty of imagery that I am super proud of but have always wondered how to move into making imagery that means more than “pretty”, more than magic tricks, more than going to really cool hard to get to places to make a photograph. Don’t get me wrong I still appreciate a photograph that has what Barthes describes as “stadium” or in my understanding a photograph that has universal appeal, like a puppy crying a sunset while staring at a woven silk lined basket filled with melting ice cream – every one and their Mom would smile at this photograph. This is plague wedding photography has been ailed with for so long. It’s written off by the other arts by being lesser than because at best it has been easily reproducible “stadium” images of a couple walking in a field. Okay, I’m ranting.. know that I still love pretty pictures and understand fully the skill it takes to make a photo like I just mentioned into fine art. But this was my journey, what else was there. I had to redefine what good wedding photography was for me. I wanted to use my medium (wedding photography) to tell more complex yet beautiful love stories. Good wedding photography is the coupling of a clients reality and a photographers skillful decisions expressed visually. I immediately knew I had to change everything I was doing and shift my paradigm. I started asking my clients (God bless them) more intimate questions, I wanted to know what made them connect, the good and the bad. Finding out how incredibly unique their stories were and not trying to fit it in to a prescribed photograph but instead creating visuals from their explanation. For Example, one of my clients said “she is so strong that it lifts me up and makes me stronger” It’s almost already a visual right? but this led to the photo with a very strong bride with a floral staff bracing a ladder with the groom atop. Hopefully you’ve seen it. Hopefully that photo means more to the couple than meets the eye, and hopefully it gives everyone else a glimpse of the wonderful world of their complex love story. Then the thought arose of a self-portrait. That’s what this shoot is… it’s my love story in a photograph. I had to take the pill and see if I could make a “wedding photograph” that expressed my singleness and longing for marriage and the frustration that goes into making something more than it is. …okay, I’m literally deciding what I will leave out of this.. The essay shows the pedestal in which I have raised weddings on while thinking I have something different to offer but at the same time making marriage out of my reach. It’s ultimately a sad series because I was raised to desire this thing in which I do not have… Okay that’s all I’ll say about it or I’ll start crying. I literally dreamt up the first image and then had to work out what it meant and this is where I landed. After the dream, I was set to purpose to make it. The number one question I get about this photo is..”is it real?” which is both very exciting and very disheartening. I want my work to transport people to a world of wonder, but I also want it to be Photography with a capital “P” and not a heavily manipulated multimedia image – but that’s for another rant and another blog post haha. I went to so many industrial salvage yards and diy stores in order to find the perfect pieces to make this image work.. In the end, I made it in my backyard. I threw boards of lumber on my car that were far longer than my subaru outback, strapped them down and ridiculously drove them home. I then got to work making the table and the chair then affixing them together to something that resembled sturdy. I took out the safety cross braces that I put in in photoshop, but that’s it. I actually used the ladder from the other image I mentioned to let Tiffany the model climb up and then I moved the ladder across the room and climbed up it myself to take the picture from the right vantage point. I wish I could go into how crazy the day was but that’s besides the point. You should ask me about it if we ever meet, it was a wild day that wouldn’t have ended with an image if it wasn’t for the people I mention below. They came through for me and I love them all for helping me dream, for wiping the sweat from my brow and ensuring me that this is a worthy pursuit. This is my desire for my clients, an image worth the toil. Not easily reproduced because it’s so personal and no two clients are so alike.
Aaron Anderson – lighting/atmosphere and general everything awesomeness
Tiffany – the model who I met the morning of the shoot – so daring
Marz – hair and makeup genius
Gabe – the model who was like “sure thing man”
Nolan – answering the call and cutting things up
Bekah – for awesome style help and bubble gum
Hannah – for making and unrivaled floral crown
Anna be – for lending me bloom this heavenly dress
Baker – for helping with the table and chair
Seriously love you guys!
Outtakes –
